The Current Universal Language
(It's Not Music)

Esperanto is a constructed language to create a common language to facilitate communication among people who speak different native languages. Taiz� mantras are an example of musical Esperanto, but that's not what I am talking about here.

Originating in the late 1880s, it was a sturdy attempt to construct a common language to insure better communication to ease conflicts and foster the union of humanity. The language still exists in some fashion all over the world.

As a bridge to universal peace and harmony, it hasn't worked yet.

Esperanto is not the only constructed language in the world. Just the other night during Star Trek, I pretended to understand Klingonese. Then there is the language of Tolkien's elves in The Lord of the Rings.

The attempt to manufacture a common tongue-common people has occupied the human mind for millennia. Babel was just not a very good idea. We've been frustrated ever since.

The common language I am referencing here is "Computereze." I don't mean the jargon and hidden meaning vocabulary of the computer techies when they talk about "analog video boards" or "OS10.1," even though it all sounds frighteningly Trekkish.

No. I mean the conflation of letters, a.k.a. characters, to communicate a message. For example, "ET cm hm." You need to know English. It doesn't work multilingually. But, it's getting to be part of common parlance. It is even appearing in-of all places-prayer.

For example:

In the July 3-10 issue of The Christian Century on page 8 is the Lord's Prayer rendered in Computereze. What is printed there is the winner of a contest generated on the humorous religion Web site, Ship of Fools. The webbies asked their webblings "to whittle down the Lord's Prayer down to 160 characters without losing anything important. (It is normally 372 characters.) As noted in Harper's (July), here is the winning entry:

dad@hvn, ur spshl.we want wot u want&urth2b like hvn.giv us food&4giv r sins lyk we 4giv uvaz.
don't test us!sav us!bcos we kno ur boss, ur tuf&ur cool 4 eva!ok?

It's revolutionary. Do you realize that should this Computereze catch on, much of GIA's publications could be reduced to a few monographs. I really hope it doesn't catch on. I cd b ot uva jb!

You can reach Fred Moleck via email at fmoleck@earthlink.net